A Coffee Hater’s Guide to Seattle

If you’re like me, you’ve had a long love-hate relationship with coffee. You love the theory and the flavour of it, but somehow a cup of coffee will always just taste like a cup of dirt. You fantasize over coffee ice cream and it’s safe to assume you’ll be ordering the affogatto for dessert, but you religiously pack tea to work so you don’t have to drink the dirt water. It makes no sense, but it is what it is.

Since moving to Seattle, the coffee capital of the universe, I’ve had a hard time finding good alternatives to coffee when out socializing with friends or studying wherever the free wifi is. I’ve been a devout Chai fanatic for many years, and yet I’ve found some places just do not get it. And you can only lower yourself to your more childish days and order hot chocolate so many times before you start to feel ridiculous, secretly yearning to love coffee so you can drink it with the other grown ups. Add on my personal level of neuroses (I’m also abstaining because I don’t want to develop a reliance on caffeine to function in the mornings) and you’ve got a year and a half long search for the best alternatives.

Caffe Vita, Chai Latte

This is hands down the best Chai latte in the city. The tea concentrate Caffe Vita uses is very spice-centred, with strong liquorice and nutmeg elements coming through. Perhaps a hint of cardamom as well. It is so much more authentic than whatever Starbucks uses, and really satisfies any chai craving. Of course, I’m a spice nut and always add extra cinnamon and nutmeg to the top. As far as Chai goes, this is the place to get it.

Caffe Vita, 1005 East Pike Street, Seattle WA 98122

Victrola, Cappuccino

For the people who still like the flavour of coffee but dislike the bitterness, the cappuccino at Victrola is a solid option. I’ve recently learned the difference between a wet and dry foam on a latte and cappuccino (I know I’m sort of an amateur), and I definitely vouch for their wetter foam that they go pretty light on. As you can see, my co-contributor Janine and I had these on our Valentines day out together.

Victrola Roastery and Cafe, 310 East Pike Street, Seattle WA

Neptune Coffee, Mocha

And of course, for the chocolate lovers, the mocha at Neptune Coffee satisfies the craving. I came in and asked for something that they made well, “but isn’t coffee”. This is what they recommended, noting that they use locally made Theo’s chocolate in it. The second someone tells me they add legit melted chocolate to a mocha, I’m sold. I’m tired of the cornstarch-laden chocolate syrup that most places use to add the chocolate to a mocha. If this were a post about Victoria, I’d tell you that Blends makes the best mocha, by melting real belgian chocolate (you get to choose milk, dark, or white) into every mocha as made. But, if I can’t have Blends, this will do in the Coffee Capital.

8415 Greenwood Ave N, Seattle, WA 98103